This is a chain letter to protest the French nuclear tests in the pacific. If you want to participate in the protest, then simply forward the letter to someone who is closer to the French president than yourself, then Jacques Chirac will probably get it sooner or later.

You may have heard that the French are thinking of resuming testing again in the you-know-where, and that some Congressmen are using that as a queue to encouraging the U.S to “complete” its testing of short range devices (showing a lot of “leadership” in the process!!??). Well, the following arrived via a friend in Hawai’i from another friend in Noumea. Enjoy!

This was a letter to the editor in an Australian newspaper:

An open letter to M. Jacques Chirac:

Mon cher Jack.

Je suis a bit fromaged off avec votre decision to blow up La Pacifique avec le Frog bombes nuclears. Je reckon vous must have un spot in La Belle France itself pour les explosions. Le Massive Central? Le Quay d’Orsay? Le Champs Elysees? Votre own back yard, peut etre?

Frappez le crows avec stones, Sport! La guerre cold est fini! Votres forces militaire need la bombe atomique about as beacoup as poisson need les bicyclettes.

Un autre point, cobber. Votre histoire militaire isn’t tres flash, consisting, n’est-ce pas, of battailles the likes of Crecy, Agincourt, Poitiers, Trafalgar, Borodino, Waterloo, Sedan et Dien Bien Phu. Un bombe won’t change le tradition.

Je/mon pere/mon grand pere/le cousin third avec ma grandmere/ la plume de ma tante fought avec votre soldats against Le Boche in WWI (le Big One). Have vous forgotten?

Reconsider, mon ami, otherwise in le hotels et estaminets de l’Australie le curse anciens d’Angleterre – “Damnation to the French” – will be heard un autre temps.

Votre chums don’t want that.

Millo