You can never tell which way the train went by looking at the track.

Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.

Whenever a system becomes completely defined,some damn fool discovers something which either abolishes the system or expands it beyond recognition.

Technology is dominated by those who manage what they do not understand.

If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs,then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilisation.

The opulence of the front office decor varies inversely with the fundamental solvency of the firm.

The attention span of a computer is only as long as its electrical cord.

An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less until he knows absolutely everything about nothing.

Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he`ll believe you Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he’ll have to touch to be sure.

All great discoveries are made by mistake.

Always draw your curves then plot your reading.

Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.

All’s well that ends.

A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours lost.

The first myth of management is that it exists.

A failure will not appear until a unit has passed final inspection.

New systems generate new problems.

To err is human,but to really foul things up requires a computer.

We dont know one millionth of one percent about anything.

Any given program,when running is obsolete.

Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.

A computer makes as many mistakes in two seconds as 20 men working 20 years make.

Nothing motivates a man more than to see his boss putting in an honest day’s work.

Some people manage by the book,even though the don’t know who wrote the book or even what book.

The primary function of the design engineer is to make things difficult for the fabricator and impossible for the servicemen.

To spot the expert,pick the one who predicts the job will take longest and cost the most.

After all is said and done,a hell of a lot more is said than done.

Any circuit design must contain at least one part which is obsolete,two parts which are unobtainable and three parts which are still under developement.

A complex system that works is invariably found to have evolved from a simple system that works.

If mathematically,you end up with the wrong answer,try multiplying by the page number.

Computers are unreliable,but humans are even more so.Any system which depends on human reliability is unreliable.

Give all orders verbally; Never write anything down that might go into a “Pearl Harbour” file.

Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity and other variables, the organism will do as it damn well pleases.

If you can’t understand it, its intuitively obvious.

The more cordial the Buyer’s secretary, the greater the odds that the competition already has the order.

In designing any type of construction, no overall dimensions can be totalled correctly after 4.30pm on a Friday. The correct total will become self evident on Monday at 8.15am.

Fill whats empty and empty whats full and scratch where it itches.

All things are possible exept skiing thru revolving doors.

The only perfect science is Hindsight.

Work smarder not harder and watch yor speling.

If its not in the computer it doesn’t exist.

If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.

When all else fails, read the instructions.

If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong.

Everything that goes up must come down.

An instrument when dropped will roll into the least accessible corner.

Any simple theory will be worded in the most complicated way.

Build a system that even a fool can use and only a fool will use it.

The degree of technical competence is inversely proportional to the level of management.